Saturday, December 01, 2007

you know when life catches up to you and - whoompf - just sets you on your ass? mine just did that to me again…and this time i’m listening…

i know that i’m not the only person to feel as though i'm not fully living…to “go through the motions”, to over-compensate in some areas for what is lacking in the others….and i know that i’m not the only one who has crisis of…(well, not exactly faith, as i do not subscribe to any formal religious beliefs…)…well, a crisis of belief i guess, belief in myself…belief in others…belief that we matter…belief that if i say what i think, i won’t fall off the earth…

how do i change who i am? and yes, i do have to do that. as odd as it sounds to my own ears, i have to become myself…and how do i do that after all these years of ingrained habits, learned fears, self-censoring…? with work, with stepping outside my comfort zones in many areas, with taking risks, with breathing, and with taking one day at a time....

6 comments:

KellyNerd said...

here is to hearing what your ass is saying !!! lol, just trying to make you smile.. I KNOW that is not what you said..

... how are you today?

... i dont think you should change who you are... i think you need to change how you see your beautiful self.

alan said...

While I doubt myself constantly, I believe fervently in you!

While I fear the repercussions of what I say, I know each word you speak is truth!

While I doubt that I matter much in the course of things, I know you and your beautiful soul matter immensely to those around you and those who know you and those who love you!

Like me!

alan

Unknown said...

With baby steps my sista! and with knowing in your heart and head that those that really really love you (us) are going to love you no matter what!

If you feel unauthentic then you owe it to yourself to take those steps, you must because life is short and you would enjoy it so much more if you were living it as you!
Love you.

KellyNerd said...

I tagged you for a really fun meme. check out my blog today to see it...

Puffer said...

it's about risks
and you are taking them:)

nina michelle said...

I could have written this post myself. It's nice to *meet* you and thank you for stopping by my blog. I hope to see you around.

nina